PLEASE HELP! Anxiety Issues!!!

[ashleinpritchard]

I adopted my Basenji mix when he was 10 weeks old from a local shelter. I was told he was a shiba inu and terrier mix. It wasn't until this summer that someone told me there was no way he couldn't be a Basenji. I had never even heard of such a breed. I did some research and there is no doubt in my mind that he is a Basenji.

He is 3 years old now and I am having some major behavior problems with him. He grew up with a Border Collie brother and so he always had a companion. Unfortunately, I got divorced and my ex took the border collie with him and the house with the fenced in backyard. After the divorce I was working 2 jobs for several weeks and so I only got to spend a few hours with him a day so his anxiety just got worse!

I am now facing multiple issues. My dogs used to be able to stay at home and entertain themselves while we were at work with no major issues.
Now that it is just Hemi (my Basenji) he will go potty, get i in the trash, and chew up furniture if he is left alone for longer than 15 minutes.

I have successfully kennel trained him since than but he seems so unhappy.

His problems:
1. Can't leave him out alone.
2. If I take him to daycare it takes 5+ hours to get him to associate with the other dogs. He just sits by himself and never wants to play catch or anything. (He grew up around other dogs so I'm not sure what the problem is)
3. He is aggressive to other male dogs that I pet. He was never aggressive with my other larger dog.

I live in a 1 bedroom apartment and my lease isn't up for another 8 months. I dont think I could handle getting another dog for him to have a companion right now. Please don't suggest giving him up for adoption because he has extreme attachment issues even strangers acknowledge that he is very attached to me. I couldn't bear the thought of his anxiety getting worse.

Please if anyone has any suggestions they would be apprieciated!!

[kjdonkers]

Hi there,
I can understand the exclamation marks, but first and foremost try to be calm and composed: dogs are master energy readers and the more anxiety the human carries, the worse it gets for the dog. They have to be able to totally trust you. That said, I find, apart from training the dog to be alone and all that, Bach remedies can do wonders. Try to figure out, maybe with some help around you, which remedy or remedies are for Hemi. I also learned recently about Anaflora, www.anaflora.com, a new series of flower remedies from the USA. On this site you can search by problem.
As for the daycare: do you leave him immediately, or do you stay with him a while to get him settled?
We find that our 2 B's can be alone in the house for about 4 hours max., after a good walk that is.

[stash]

All I can think of is re exercise, are you being able to get him exercise in the morning and evening, can you get a dog walker during the day. Your boy has had some major changes so it's understandable things are hard at the moment and he is hanging onto you as you are the only constant in his life at the moment. Hopefully you will get some more advice on the forum. Hope things get better for the both of you.

Jolanda and Kaiser

[eeeefarm]

You have a difficult situation on your hands. Hopefully he will start to adjust to his new situation, but in the meantime you have limited options. Crating him when you must be out is necessary if he is being destructive, but may lead to new problems. Are you sure daycare won't work? If you make it a routine, perhaps he will find some friends among the regular clientele and start looking forward to the company. Getting another dog yourself, even if possible, won't necessarily solve your problem, but if you decided to give it a try the best way would be with something you can get out of if it doesn't work, e.g. a foster. And best if it's a female. Same sex aggression isn't unusual in Basenjis, and your other dog would have been an exception because he was raised with him.

Any chance your ex would give you the other dog or alternately take yours? You might not want to give him up, but it could be the best thing for him under the circumstances.

[dropit]

He should adjust in time to losing his companion. However long that takes is questionable though and he will continue to be angry and feel neglected and reflect that anger with destruction just out of loneliness. It may improve with time and may not. You have to ask yourself is this fair for your dog? I would spend nearly all my time with him when I was home taking walks, etc. and if you can't do more than 2 hrs. it may be best to find a better home for him where he has a better environment. If his new home is a better place where there is a yard to run, and owners that can spend more time with him he will gradually accept the new home and owners. I know that is hard but may be the best. When your living situation improves you may think about owning another dog.
Other than that, working 2 jobs leaves the dog alone too much to be fair so you need to get someone…the same person all the time... over to your apartment to spend time with him if you don't want to give him up. He can bond to that person and that will help the loneliness somewhat. If you decided to give him up, the new owners could come over frequently for walks and visits before you gave the dog to them so that the dog would consider them friends before adoption, that would help the dog transition. I would not give that dog to an inexperienced owner though. That could end in disaster. It will do the same things with the new owner although it should get over the transition quicker because it will be in a better environment. Also, was your husband the dog's leader? You now have to be a positive leader for him because it sounds like he lacks leadership.